It felt weird staring at the mirror. The person who stared back seemed a lot different from the person whom I originally knew. Though there wasn’t any obvious difference, I could see certain changes. This person was slightly exhausted, but the fire was still burning in her eyes, if not brighter. This person was different from what she was a few years back. And how quickly she has changed. Has it been 3 years already?
And that’s how it struck me how fast things were moving. June 30th 2015. Half of 2015 is done and I was just getting started with my resolutions. I want to shout ‘Wait’ like how a small kid does when others start the game, before the kid is ready. I know it’s a lost cause because time isn’t going to wait. I remember 2013. That was a very happening year. Just when I kept convincing myself that 2013 was over and that I had to embrace 2014, that year was over too. And now we’re halfway through 2015. Sigh!
For a better part of my life, I grew up looking forward to something. The anticipation kept me going. When I was young I saw my sister going to school and I was looking forward to going to school (so much so that my mom couldn’t tolerate my incessant enquiries and sent me to a play school). With school you know how it is, you look forward to the weekends, events, end-of-term holidays and then the next year. Same thing happened at college but 10x times quicker. After I was done with college I was looking forward to my first vacation abroad. Then I had taken up internship till such time I got my joining date at work and tried my luck with freelancing before joining. Then I had a Kashmir Holiday and a few visits to look forward to. That was 2013.
Now we’re in 2015. Where did the 1.5 years fly? It all seems vague and I hardly remember any events of importance.
You know how they say time moves at a snail’s place when you’re waiting for something to happen. That is true. All these years I’ve wondered why time went so slowly. And once I realized there was nothing important to look forward to, life is moving so fast. The days, weeks and months seem to be moving at a tremendous speed and it’s uncanny at certain times. Not that we had an control earlier, but when it gives the illusion that things are spiralling out of your control and there is nothing you can do about it even if you wanted to, is slightly scary.
As Calvin rightly says ‘It’s funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.”
I looked back at the person staring at me from the mirror and smiled, wondering what the other person thought of me. Would she be happy to see how far she has come, or does she feel there is still a long way to go? I let the questions rest and smiled at her, and she smiled back at me. I had made peace with my present.
Image Courtesy: Google